Battlefield (Here this time)

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Battlefield (Here this time)

Post  Chance on Sat Jun 27, 2009 11:30 am

This is a book i'm writing. I'm 12 by the way. Go easy on me Very Happy. It's my second book



Chapter 1


Well, this is the life of Aaron Solemn. And you actually opened up this journal? Ha, you have no idea what you’re getting into. No idea. But you might as well keep reading this, because you picked it up anyway. So while you’re reading, I’m fighting. I could be in a battle right now. But you wouldn’t know. So if you want a story of war, than you have the right book in your hands. Let’s hope you can handle it.

Day 1. Boot Camp
There’s nothing I particularly like about boot camp. All the food sucks, in fact, one guy had a cockroach crawl right across his plate. He sat there, just staring at it. He tried to be a man about the incident. Ha! Everybody could see the expression on his face, it was sort of saying, “Get it AWAY!” But he tried not to show it. What a stupid idea. Everyone made fun of him that whole week. I even started to pitch in and laugh. I ended up having to brush the floors because I was the least favorite of the Headmaster. Great first day right?
So after I get finished cleaning the scummy floors, I walk to my dorm, to cool down and relax. Yeah right. Immediately when I walk in I am greeted by the four toughest guys in the whole area, who I like to call the “Lead Heads.” One grabbed me by the throat, lifting me in the air. I could see his grim smirk. I grabbed his hands, struggling to breath. It seemed like I couldn’t move. Like I was frozen in that spot. My vision started to go blurry, and my mind went blank. I thought I was dead. Never to be seen again. The Headmaster definitely wouldn’t care. Just as I was slipping unconscious, he let go.
I dropped to the floor, trying to get as much air as I could possibly take in. I was lying there, panting. The Lead Heads laughed, their loud chuckles filled the room, seeming to surround everything, and anything near it. They walked off, leaving me on the floor, gasping for air. When I felt like I could finally get up, I didn’t. I stayed. It had left me stunned, how serious the look in his eye was. But to him it was all a game. Life, was just a game.

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Re: Battlefield (Here this time)

Post  JonnyKid on Wed Jul 01, 2009 12:36 pm

it was ok, you should work on increasing your vocabulary, sometimes you seemed to be struggling to find the right words, the toughest guys in the whole area was one time, also boot camps dont have headmasters they have drill sergeants

overall not bad
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Re: Battlefield (Here this time)

Post  Potchi on Fri Jul 03, 2009 6:06 am


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Re: Battlefield (Here this time)

Post  Phantasm on Fri Jul 03, 2009 7:27 am

^Lol.
Cool story, bro.

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Re: Battlefield (Here this time)

Post  Glitch on Sat Jul 04, 2009 5:05 am

^
^

Lol. I didn't really get it at some points but yea, cool story bro.

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Re: Battlefield (Here this time)

Post  SoulKiller on Sun Jul 05, 2009 8:16 pm

um did you make this story? Very Happy

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Re: Battlefield (Here this time)

Post  Stealth on Sun Jul 05, 2009 8:18 pm

yes he did that it why he posted it here. Please read the first bit of his post.
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